Especially in therapy with men and women in their 20s and 30s, I find a major theme is the evolving understanding and experience of what love is, or rather the many, indeed infinite, things love is.

We find our own relationship to love just as we do to our work, our career, to money, to solitude.

Is love going to be a defining force at this point in my life–a quest for it,  a suffering over it, a sacrifice for it, a flow of it?

Is it something I feel strongly and strongly need?  Is it a mystery to me:  What is this thing everyone talks about? 

Is it, to the extent I’ve felt it, nice but not worth the trouble?

Do I know it most strongly through pain?

Am I clenching tightly to this pain even as I feel I’d give anything to have never had it happen?  Would I not know myself without this suffering?

And two of the biggest questions:  Am I capable of loving another person?  Am I loveable?